In Service

Very truly, I tell you, unless a grain of wheat falls into the earth and dies, it remains just a single grain; but if it dies, it bears much fruit. Those who love their life lose it, and those who hate their life in this world will keep it for eternal life. Whoever serves me must follow me, and where I am, there will my servant be also. Whoever serves me, the Father will honour.

‘Now my soul is troubled. And what should I say—“Father, save me from this hour”? No, it is for this reason that I have come to this hour. Father, glorify your name.’ Then a voice came from heaven, ‘I have glorified it, and I will glorify it again.’ The crowd standing there heard it and said that it was thunder. Others said, ‘An angel has spoken to him.’ Jesus answered, ‘This voice has come for your sake, not for mine. Now is the judgement of this world; now the ruler of this world will be driven out. And I, when I am lifted up from the earth, will draw all people* to myself.’

-John 12:24-32

"Unless a grain of wheat falls to the earth and dies, it remains a single grain." Often we are told Jesus is speaking allegorically of his own death, and I am certain that is true. But here the allegory is not just about him, it's about all of us. Life transformed is a life that has been given over to something other than selfishness, or what we'd call ego. Life transformed is a life where the influence of Spirit may indeed create something far, far away from personal expectations, from the "shoulds" and "have tos" we thought were ours. To give up one's life for the Lord may indeed have the effect of taking one's life away, and replacing it with something far different from our own expectations. This is the fruit of following the Lord.

Jesus also teaches the crowd about his own death, which he expects and accepts as part of the exchange of his earthly life and human expectations for the will of the Father, the life transformed and transfigured by God-likeness. He dies for a cause and a purpose and to bear fruit. And for a further reason, to bring Judgment. If the God-like meet their fate, as caused by hatred of what that Spirit creates, then Judgment can be made in the world.

I think the notion of Judgment causes profound fear in some, and great personal expectation in others. But the common thread for both Jesus' teachings about himself, and his allegory here for our own lives, is that Spirit builds Judgment, and that this is something none of us with our human, earthly expectations can create or build or know of ourselves alone.

It is the life transfigured that bears fruit for Judgment, for the conviction of evil, and for the good. In this service, none of us are gifted with the vision of service of ourselves alone to decide how that may work - our earthly expectations alone can't do it. We need open the door to Spirit to lead us. To follow Jesus where he goes means that we also seek the will of the Father in our lives, through dialogue and prayer.