Therefore what God has joined together, let not man separate

 

 Then He arose from there and came to the region of Judea by the other side of the Jordan.  And multitudes gathered to Him again, and as He was accustomed, He taught them again.  The Pharisees came and asked Him, "Is it lawful for a man to divorce his wife?" testing Him.  And He answered and said to them, "What did Moses command you?"  They said, "Moses permitted a man to write a certificate of divorce, and to dismiss her."  And Jesus answered and said to them, "Because of the hardness of your heart he wrote you this precept.  But from the beginning of the creation, God 'made them male and female.'  'For this reason a man shall leave his father and mother and be joined to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh'; so then they are no longer two, but one flesh.  Therefore what God has joined together, let not man separate."  In the house His disciples also asked Him again about the same matter.  So He said to them, "Whoever divorces his wife and marries another commits adultery against her.  And if a woman divorces her husband and marries another, she commits adultery."

Then they brought little children to Him, that He might touch them; but the disciples rebuked those who brought them.  But when Jesus saw it, He was greatly displeased and said to them, "Let the little children come to Me, and do not forbid them; for of such is the kingdom of God.  Assuredly, I say to you, whoever does not receive the kingdom of God as a little child will by no means enter it."  And He took them up in His arms, laid His hands on them, and blessed them.

 

- Mark 10:1–16 

 

In yesterday's reading, Jesus continued to teach the disciples regarding the places of greatness in His Church:   "But whoever causes one of these little ones who believe in Me to stumble, it would be better for him if a millstone were hung around his neck, and he were thrown into the sea.  If your hand causes you to sin, cut it off.  It is better for you to enter into life maimed, rather than having two hands, to go to hell, into the fire that shall never be quenched -- where 'Their worm does not die, and the fire is not quenched.'  And if your foot causes you to sin, cut it off.  It is better for you to enter life lame, rather than having two feet, to be cast into hell, into the fire that shall never be quenched -- where 'Their worm does not die, and the fire is not quenched.'  And if your eye causes you to sin, pluck it out.  It is better for you to enter the kingdom of God with one eye, rather than having two eyes, to be cast into hell fire -- where 'Their worm does not die, and the fire is not quenched.'  For everyone will be seasoned with fire, and every sacrifice will be seasoned with salt.  Salt is good, but if the salt loses its flavor, how will you season it?  Have salt in yourselves, and have peace with one another." 

Then He arose from there and came to the region of Judea by the other side of the Jordan.  And multitudes gathered to Him again, and as He was accustomed, He taught them again.  The Pharisees came and asked Him, "Is it lawful for a man to divorce his wife?" testing Him.  And He answered and said to them, "What did Moses command you?"  They said, "Moses permitted a man to write a certificate of divorce, and to dismiss her."  And Jesus answered and said to them, "Because of the hardness of your heart he wrote you this precept.  But from the beginning of the creation, God 'made them male and female.'  'For this reason a man shall leave his father and mother and be joined to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh'; so then they are no longer two, but one flesh.  Therefore what God has joined together, let not man separate."  In the house His disciples also asked Him again about the same matter.  So He said to them, "Whoever divorces his wife and marries another commits adultery against her.  And if a woman divorces her husband and marries another, she commits adultery." My study Bible comments that in contrast to the easy access to divorce under the Mosaic Law, and because of the misuse of divorce at the time of Christ, Jesus repeatedly condemns divorce (see, for example, Matthew 5:31-32 and 19:8-9) and emphasizes the eternal nature of marriage.  Jesus cites Genesis 1:27, 5:2 and Genesis 2:24 in His statement about the nature of marriage as a holy institution.  Here in Mark's Gospel Christ's statement against divorce is categorical, but in Matthew's Gospel He makes an exception ("for sexual immorality" - Matthew 19:8-9), showing that the bonds of marriage can be destroyed by sin, which in any case is still acknowledged in the Church as a spiritual tragedy.  In the early Church the permissible reasons for divorce were expanded to include threat to a spouse's or  child's life and desertion.

Then they brought little children to Him, that He might touch them; but the disciples rebuked those who brought them.  But when Jesus saw it, He was greatly displeased and said to them, "Let the little children come to Me, and do not forbid them; for of such is the kingdom of God.  Assuredly, I say to you, whoever does not receive the kingdom of God as a little child will by no means enter it."  And He took them up in His arms, laid His hands on them, and blessed them.  My study Bible comments that, according to Theophylact, the disciples rebuked the mothers for bringing little children to Christ both because their manner was "unruly" and also because they thought children "diminished His dignity as Teacher and Master."  But Jesus rejects this thinking, and instead sets little children as an example of those who inherit the kingdom of God.   Therefore, my study Bible says, children are invited (even as an example to adults) to participate in the Kingdom through prayer, worship, baptism, christmation, and Communion.  Elsewhere Theophylact writes, "A little child is not arrogant, he does not despise anyone, he is innocent and guileless.  He does not inflate himself in the presence of important people, nor withdraw from those in sorrows.  Instead, he lives in complete simplicity."

Jesus holds up little children as the standard by which one receives the kingdom of God in today's reading.  But let us look at the context, for He continues to address issues of power and rank, as was begun in Saturday's reading when He responded to the disciples' dispute about who would have the places of greatest honor ("who would be the greatest") in the Kingdom they expect will be His.  Clearly they think a worldly, material kingdom will manifest as they understand Christ to be the Messiah, in keeping with popular expectation.  But Jesus begins to address notions of greatness in both Saturday's and Monday's readings (see above), teaching them what greatness means in the context of His Church, and hence what kind of stewards and bishops they must become.  In today's reading, the Pharisees' question serves as another basis for Christ to address notions of power and social status, and the proper conduct for those who call themselves His followers.  In particular, of course, this statement regarding divorce is brought in response to questions that apply to men, as Jewish women could not ask for divorce.  In Christ's time, this was a very hotly debated topic, with the Pharisees actually coming down more on the side Jesus advocates, rather than their opponents.  The subject could also involve complicated problems regarding money brought into the marriage and questions that pertained to second marriages as well, even practices in which the same couple divorced and remarried for financial reasons.  When Jesus speaks of the "hardness of your hearts" He is addressing men as those who would obtain the certificate of divorce for reasons that could be trivial (or simply financial, as the case may be).   Moreover, let us understand the position of women in the society which often was dependent upon marriage.  If we look at Christ's own mother, we understand through tradition that her marriage to Joseph was a conventional one for protection and respectability; she had been consecrated as young child for service in the Temple, and her marriage to an older man, Joseph, was expected to remain chaste.  So the questions of divorce, and even the subsequent discussion about little children -- the second time in as many days the topic has come up -- remains focused on issues of power and its abuse.  Marriage as an institution of God is understood as fidelity to union:  "the two shall become one flesh," with devotion paramount to the marriage over and against even father and mother ("a man shall leave his father and mother").  These are important questions to understand in the context of the society and questions of inheritance and social status, and in particular the dependency of women on marriage.  In a modern context, we might consider that society has worked very hard at creating conditions of material and social equality for men and women, but nevertheless marriage remains a foundation for social structure, both for men and women and for children as well.  There remain clear spiritual, psychological, and even physical health benefits from such relationships.  It remains a spiritual tragedy for abuse to destroy the bonds of marriage, even when material hardship is minimized or lessened.  Christ's emphasis on fidelity within this context remains essential for us to understand what loving relationships are, including His emphasis on the goodness of little children.  He knocks down all sense of rank or social status within the context of love and the ways in which He calls upon us to view one another and to treat one another -- even to cherish one another.  It remains our challenge, as we can simply look around ourselves and see how many relationships seem to break down into questions of hierarchy and balance of power rather than love.  From my observation, this applies to modern relationships in all contexts, despite social movements made in the name of equality and gender rights.   Clearly problems of hierarchy and power remain within modern relationships of all kinds, with Jesus' implications over the past few readings remaining firmly in the context of love and fidelity, and against abuse of any kind.   Men and women in marriage are "one flesh" and little children "of the kingdom of God."    Let us remember the spiritual tragedy of abuse, and seek to cherish one another as Christ teaches.

Is it lawful for a man to divorce his wife for just any reason?

 Now it came to pass, when Jesus had finished these sayings, that He departed from Galilee and came to the region of Judea beyond the Jordan.  And great multitudes followed Him, and He healed them there.  The Pharisees also came to Him, testing Him, and saying to Him, "Is it lawful for a man to divorce his wife for just any reason?"  And He answered and said to them, "Have you not read that He who made them at the beginning 'made them male and female,' and said, 'For this reason a man shall leave his father and mother and be joined to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh'?  So then, they are no longer two but one flesh.  Therefore what God has joined together, let not man separate."  They said to Him, "Why then did Moses command to give a certificate of divorce, and to put her away?"  He said to them, "Moses, because of the hardness of your hearts, permitted you to divorce from your wives, but from the beginning it was not so.  And I say to you, whoever divorces his wife, except for sexual immorality, and marries another, commits adultery; and whoever marries her who is divorced commits adultery."

His disciples said to Him, "If such is the case of the man with his wife, it is better not to marry."  But He said to them, "All cannot accept this saying, but only those to whom it has been given:  For there are eunuchs who were born thus from their mother's womb, and there are eunuchs who were made eunuchs by men, and there are eunuchs who have made themselves eunuchs for the kingdom of heaven's sake.  He who is able to accept it, let him accept it."

- Matthew 19:1-12

In yesterday's reading, we were told that after Jesus explained a system for mutual correction in the Church,  Peter came to Him and said, "Lord, how often shall my brother sin against me, and I forgive him?  Up to seven times?"  Jesus said to him, "I do not say to you, up to seven times, but up to seventy times seven.  Therefore the kingdom of heaven is like a certain king who wanted to settle accounts with his servants.  And when he had begun to settle accounts, one was brought to him who owed him ten thousand talents.  But as he was not able to pay, his master commanded that he be sold, with his wife and children and all that he had, and that payment be made.  The servant therefore fell down before him, saying, 'Master, have patience with me, and I will pay you all.'  Then the master of that servant was moved with compassion, released him, and forgave him the debt.  But that servant went out and found one of his fellow servants who owed him a hundred denarii; and he laid hands on him and took him by the throat, saying, 'Pay me what you owe!'  So his fellow servant fell down at his feet and begged him, saying, 'Have patience with me, and I will pay you all.'  And he would not, but went and threw him into prison till he should pay the debt.  So when his fellow servants saw what had been done, they were very grieved, and came and told their master all that had been done.  Then his master, after he had called him, said to him, 'You wicked servant!  I forgave you all that debt because you begged me.  Should you not also have had compassion on your fellow servant, just as I had pity on you?'  And his master was angry, and delivered him to the torturers until he should pay all that was due to him.  So My heavenly Father also will do to you if each of you, from his heart, does not forgive his brother his trespasses."

 Now it came to pass, when Jesus had finished these sayings, that He departed from Galilee and came to the region of Judea beyond the Jordan.  And great multitudes followed Him, and He healed them there.  The Pharisees also came to Him, testing Him, and saying to Him, "Is it lawful for a man to divorce his wife for just any reason?"  And He answered and said to them, "Have you not read that He who made them at the beginning 'made them male and female,' and said, 'For this reason a man shall leave his father and mother and be joined to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh'?  So then, they are no longer two but one flesh.  Therefore what God has joined together, let not man separate."  They said to Him, "Why then did Moses command to give a certificate of divorce, and to put her away?"  He said to them, "Moses, because of the hardness of your hearts, permitted you to divorce from your wives, but from the beginning it was not so.  And I say to you, whoever divorces his wife, except for sexual immorality, and marries another, commits adultery; and whoever marries her who is divorced commits adultery."  My study bible notes that the basis of the Pharisees' test is Deuteronomy 24:1-4.  Jesus' overall concern is for love and he purpose of marriage as love and spiritual bond between husband and wife.  As is so often the case, the emphasis is on love and inclusion, particularly of the "weaker" one socially.  He speaks of the "hardness of your hearts" referring pointedly to the men, who were the only ones who could initiate divorce under Jewish law.  (Roman women could do so, but Jewish women could not.  These are the Pharisees He is speaking to.)  We really must keep in mind that He has just finished instructing the disciples about care of the "little ones," and about humility in His Church.  That is, a difference between the ways that worldly power is used and the ways that His holy power is used in service to God who is love.  (See, for example, Luke 9:55, in which Jesus told His disciples, "You do not know what manner of spirit you are of.")  Jesus hearkens in His answer the purpose of marriage as given in the creation of the world and of human life in the Garden, an image of peace and of love -- spiritual union as original principle of monogamous marriage.  For our weaknesses we are given consideration, and for the conditions of a world and human beings "separated" from God (what is called the Fall), and struggling with all kinds of resulting spiritual problems and oppression.  But the original purpose still stands in Jesus' teaching (see Genesis 1 and 2).  Jesus adds His own authoritative prohibitions against divorce, says my study bible, including the exception "except for sexual immorality."   But we must understand this in context of human weakness and compassion.  In the early Church, the reasons for permissible divorce were expanded to include a threat to spouse's or child's life and desertion.   This does not diminish the acknowledgement of the spiritual tragedy in such situations.  Abuse of a marriage bond must be seen in these terms.

His disciples said to Him, "If such is the case of the man with his wife, it is better not to marry."  But He said to them, "All cannot accept this saying, but only those to whom it has been given:  For there are eunuchs who were born thus from their mother's womb, and there are eunuchs who were made eunuchs by men, and there are eunuchs who have made themselves eunuchs for the kingdom of heaven's sake.  He who is able to accept it, let him accept it."  For much of history, eunuchs were a class of people who held powerful offices within kingdoms and systems of hierarchy.   These were often men who had been castrated in order to hold such a position (such as in guarding women of nobility) or by birth, defect, disease, or mutilation.  Jesus is using the term figuratively for those whose practice is lifelong celibacy for the kingdom of heaven's sake.    This isn't a rejection of marriage; it's rather a holy or consecrated virginity, having nothing to do with self-mutilation (condemned at the First Ecumenical Council).  See St. Paul's discussion of marriage and celibacy in the early Church (1 Corinthians 7:7, 25-38).

What is marriage?  We have to see in the image of marriage given in Genesis a kind of union of humanity, a sense in which hierarchy does not play a role.  Differences between men and women - regardless of current standards for equality - for almost all of human history have remained within a social category of power differences.  Most often, there are "realms" of women and "realms" of men, a kind of separation of social participation, such as in child rearing or running of the home (that includes for much of the world farming and economics as well).  But the picture we're given here goes beyond equality -- two "become one flesh."  Jesus  is talking about a spiritual union, consecrated by God who is love.  I believe we must see all of His teachings under this umbrella, whether we refer to the just-previous readings or the whole of the Gospels.  His concern is with the "little ones," and with love.  All the virtues named by my study bible apply here as well as to Jesus' statement, "Unless you are converted and become as little children, you will by no means enter the kingdom of heaven" (in Wednesday's reading).  That is, character traits of humility, dependence, lowliness, simplicity, obedience, and a willingness to love and be loved are also those characteristics necessary on both sides for a good spiritual bond in marriage.  You don't find love without humility, or a willingness to love and be loved.  Dependence is for both partners, regardless of social status, as it exists in many dimensions and expressions.  As is so often the case, Jesus' teachings leave us with the understanding that our bonds and ties with one another don't just depend on one side, but upon each of us living in faith.  A marriage is a type of mirror of the two greatest commandments to love God with all one's heart and soul and strength, and to love neighbor with the same. The difference is that this bond goes much deeper than that with a neighbor; this is a bond that results in two becoming one.  And just as relevant are the teachings given in recent readings on mutual correction and forgiveness.  In this context, marriage has often been seen by the Church as the layperson's way to holiness.  A marriage is filled with an ongoing need for understanding and practice of loving mutual correction, the importance of self-awareness and acknowledgement of our own shortcomings and harm we may do, and for forgiveness.   Jesus gave us a picture of an open dialogue for "offenses" in His teaching on mutual correction in the Church.  A sound marriage (and good therapy and spiritual direction) will encourage the same truthfulness with love and capacity for forgiveness.  This is all the work of the heart, something we lose sight of too often in modern discussions about marriage and its nature.  Let us start with love and mercy, and the help of the grace of God, and take our perspective and "work" from there.   We don't live in a perfect world, but the practice of love requires consciousness, the discipline of obedience and humility, and the help of grace.  The abuse of such hope is always a spiritual tragedy.